Dublin Up: Stepsons

by Carl Coffee

If Coffee Time is a fun/competitive team, than the Stepsons appear to be a competitive/serious team. Led by Austin Bischoff, who played in the NWLA Tournament from 2012-14. Austin moved to North Dakota this summer and isn’t eligible to suit up with the Dads to defend a title, so he is taking his talents from Dublin to London. This squad seems to be all business. None of these four players have ever played in London before, which could get interesting. Here is the team:

Joel Crozier  #13  SS/P

Every player is going to pitch a round robin game, which is a smart strategy, but I would be very surprised to see Joel throw in the single-elim playoffs. He has a WSEM Diamond Digit Handy, and speed, so he could be better used in the field. Joel or Werner will probably lead off, and everyone knows “Crush It” is clutch. Joel can hit to any part of the field, and will hustle on every play. I expect him to have a big tourney.

Austin Bischoff  #24  (C) P

Austin is the obvious choice to pitch when the games matter. He has good hands, and the other three guys are quicker than him. Plus, it's Austin Bischoff… he belongs on the mound. Austin has always been an average hitter in WSEM play, but he’s no slack. He will hit some bombs, and give awkward high-fives. Without wiffleball in his life this summer, expect him to go all out in London, as this is the only time he gets to play competitively all year.

Scott Kujawa  #25  OF/P

Scott has run away in WSEM play as the obvious RotY winner because of his pitching. He is a good, not great hitter. However, London slow-pitch and WSEM fast-pitch might as well be completely different sports. The White Asian is the wildcard on the team. He was the final player added, and could either be the best player on the team or the worst. I really don’t know what to expect from him.

Stephen Werner  #29  OF/P

Wern Smash was courted by multiple guys as they were building their London teams, so he had the unique opportunity to choose who he wanted to play for. Smash likes to win and can get intense, so joining this team was a no-brainer. He’s had a solid young WSEM career, played well in NWLA Regionals, and should shine in London. He loves to slide though, so he needs to remember not to do that.

Dublin Up: Coffee Time

by Carl Coffee

Coffee Time is one of three WSEM London teams traveling down to Central Ohio to play in the world’s largest slow-pitch wiffleball tournament. It has a solid mix of London veterans and London rookies. Captaining the team is Michael Sessions, who shined in 2013 on the London practice squad team, Flacid Squids. Here is the team:

Zac Adams  #9  OF/EH/P

Zac Attack can do it all. He has played in an NWLA Tournament with KWL, he is in the WSEM Dads Championship picture, and now he makes his London debut. Zac is the ultimate utility guy. You can bat him anywhere in the lineup, and put him anywhere in the field. He can drink beer or liquor. He can stay quiet, or stay very quiet. He looks good in a hat, or without a hat. You can’t lose with this guy.

Brandon Corbett  #17  SS/EH

Corbs is the super London veteran on the team. He played back in 2005, when the tournament was at a different location and silos were used as home run fences. He missed last tournament because he drank too much the night before, or he lost his insulin, or he secretly hated his team. Maybe all three. Corbs played shortstop back in the day, so he probably will play there for Coffee Time. He will give you 5-8 home runs at the dish, and can catch line drives in the field. Catching pop ups on the other hand…

Michael Sessions  #25  (C) EH/P

Sessions is still the be(i)n(t)ch coach for the Dads, but on Saturday, his time will be spent in London. The Mayor has built a solid squad, and the slow-pitch format helps his strengths. London is littered with hillbillies without shoes, so he will feel at home here. His Hillsdale High School Track experience will help run the 50’ distance from Home to first base. You may see Sessions pitch if the team is up by 15-20 runs, or if he secretly roofies his team to get on the field. I wouldn’t bet against the latter.

Mark Phillips  #71  P

Marky Mark is the starting pitcher on Coffee Time, and he is a crafty second year London Wiffle vet. He can mix up speeds, change pitching heights, and paint the corners. His hands are like a Kodiak bear. He can grab the ball just like a bear grabs innocent salmon swimming upstream. He is old enough to be half of the team’s father, but he acts like one of the guys. If you ever don’t see Mark with a beer you, should be worried. Mark will probably hit a couple of long dongs, and he will probably criticize all of Sessions' decisions.

Craig Skinner  #99  OF/EH

Since London got too big to keep stats anymore, we have to take Mark for his word when he talks about Craig Skinner’s performance in the 2014 London tourney. Mark said Craig was the best player on the Super Dads, so this is a great last minute signing for Coffee Time. Craig has sneaky left-handed power, and can give you close to a dozen bombs if he is focused. He wants to play in the NWLA Tourney, so he takes out his anger on the ball in London. He always seems to never pay attention in the field, but Sessions will still probably put him in LF or RF.

Ray Brown  #100  OF/SS

Ray is another solid late addition to Coffee Time, and another quality utility specialist. Ray will be able to do anything you need from him. He seems to have a lot of patience, as I have never met anyone who can hang with Craig so much. Hopefully that patience translates to London tourney rules, as you should wait for your pitch and not swing at nonsense.