by Carl Coffee
Zac Adams #9 OF/EH/P
Zac Attack can do it all. He has played in an NWLA Tournament with KWL, he is in the WSEM Dads Championship picture, and now he makes his London debut. Zac is the ultimate utility guy. You can bat him anywhere in the lineup, and put him anywhere in the field. He can drink beer or liquor. He can stay quiet, or stay very quiet. He looks good in a hat, or without a hat. You can’t lose with this guy.
Brandon Corbett #17 SS/EH
Corbs is the super London veteran on the team. He played back in 2005, when the tournament was at a different location and silos were used as home run fences. He missed last tournament because he drank too much the night before, or he lost his insulin, or he secretly hated his team. Maybe all three. Corbs played shortstop back in the day, so he probably will play there for Coffee Time. He will give you 5-8 home runs at the dish, and can catch line drives in the field. Catching pop ups on the other hand…
Michael Sessions #25 (C) EH/P
Sessions is still the be(i)n(t)ch coach for the Dads, but on Saturday, his time will be spent in London. The Mayor has built a solid squad, and the slow-pitch format helps his strengths. London is littered with hillbillies without shoes, so he will feel at home here. His Hillsdale High School Track experience will help run the 50’ distance from Home to first base. You may see Sessions pitch if the team is up by 15-20 runs, or if he secretly roofies his team to get on the field. I wouldn’t bet against the latter.
Mark Phillips #71 P
Marky Mark is the starting pitcher on Coffee Time, and he is a crafty second year London Wiffle vet. He can mix up speeds, change pitching heights, and paint the corners. His hands are like a Kodiak bear. He can grab the ball just like a bear grabs innocent salmon swimming upstream. He is old enough to be half of the team’s father, but he acts like one of the guys. If you ever don’t see Mark with a beer you, should be worried. Mark will probably hit a couple of long dongs, and he will probably criticize all of Sessions' decisions.
Craig Skinner #99 OF/EH
Since London got too big to keep stats anymore, we have to take Mark for his word when he talks about Craig Skinner’s performance in the 2014 London tourney. Mark said Craig was the best player on the Super Dads, so this is a great last minute signing for Coffee Time. Craig has sneaky left-handed power, and can give you close to a dozen bombs if he is focused. He wants to play in the NWLA Tourney, so he takes out his anger on the ball in London. He always seems to never pay attention in the field, but Sessions will still probably put him in LF or RF.
Ray Brown #100 OF/SS
Ray is another solid late addition to Coffee Time, and another quality utility specialist. Ray will be able to do anything you need from him. He seems to have a lot of patience, as I have never met anyone who can hang with Craig so much. Hopefully that patience translates to London tourney rules, as you should wait for your pitch and not swing at nonsense.
